Life Changes

Ok, so I haven't blogged in a while. I haven't needed to vent I guess. Until now that is. I know I've talked about my wanting a baby and then not being sure and then being scared it would take forever etc... Well me and Josh finally decided to really go for it. Not just wait and see what happens. As I expected my doctor sent me straight to infertility. Ok well technically I didn't expect that, but I knew I would have to take fertility drugs. I kinda thought she would give it a shot with me first, but no. She just sent me straight to the pros. That made me EXTREMELY emotional. I don't know why. I was expecting to have to take fertility drugs so why did it bother me that she was getting someone else to prescribe them? I guess I just felt like I was worse off than I originally thought. lol So I cried when I left her office and was a blubbering mess and Josh told me not to worry of course, and I got over it pretty quickly. This first month at the infertility clinic has just been a tracking cycle with no drugs and to me it's been a complete waste of a month, but what do I know? Soon I will be starting clomid and now I'm beginning to freak out a little. I know I want a baby. I do. But I am a control freak. Type A at it's best, and I don't know what a baby will do to my life. I know my life right now. I know my routine. I'm in a good place. My marriage is awesome. I'm soooo happy. Probably the happiest I've ever been. I got my house. Things are going great. I am so scared of the unknown. A child will change everything. EVERYTHING. It will take away the lazy days of snuggling up on the couch with my hubby and my dog and watching TV until I can't stay awake. That is when I'm the happiest. When I'm at home with my husband with a good meal, and absolutely nothing to do but relax and unwind. It's my favorite place in the world to be. There is nowhere else I'd rather be in those moments. A baby will change all that, and I don't know what to expect. And that scares me. I know any mother would tell me that it's sooo worth it. That their child is the best thing that ever happened to them, and they wouldn't change it for the world. But can you mothers honestly say you don't miss your old life every once in a while? (Not that you would change anything), just that you miss the carefreeness of your life before? Ugh. I have to stop doing this. I really do. I think one thing that stresses me the most is that Josh isn't stressed. LOL Well, we are stressed about different things I guess. He is only stressed about the financial aspect of it. That doesn't scare me at all. I'm stressed about life changing, baby crying, mommy crying, no sleep, having to work, who will watch baby, am I gonna be any good at being a mommy? Those things. That's what scares me. Well let's just hope I can get pregnant. How about that? How about we take one step at a time Becca....try that for once.

Follow up on my Slacker blog

I just now re-read my blog about being a slacker and thought I'd give an update. Apparently I am in a much better place than I was. I have officially lost 10lbs so obviously I found a little self-discipline. We had our best month at work in March and I got an awesome bonus so that helped with the working harder and saving money aspect, and I totally finished that book I had started and I LOVED it and I have since read 2 more :) I have a problem with run on sentences. (random I know but I was proof reading) We don't need to discuss the cleaning house thing. I mean it's only been a few months people give me some time :) Oh, and obviously u can see more of what I am talking about with the baby thing if u read that post too. I'm totally lost!

Is anybody NOT pregnant?

Ok, so I realize I am at the age where it is probably time to start a family. We have talked about it quite a bit lately, but are not actively TRYING to have a baby. There are days when I want one sooo bad and then there are days when I question myself and think I'm just not ready. The problem for me is that EVERYONE is pregnant or has just had a baby. ALL of my friends that are my age either just had a baby or are pregnant. Not some.... ALL. I do not have a single friend my age that I still hang out with that does not have a child or is not carrying one. It is almost overwhelming. I know that probably sounds stupid, but I feel like I am in baby overload. Not because I don't LOVE talking with my friends about their babies, but because I kinda feel like I missed the boat and I'm not sure if I wanted to be on it or not? That may not make any sense. It's just the way I feel. And when I say I missed the boat, don't take that literally. I realize I am still very young and have PLENTY of time to get on the boat so to speak. I just feel overly baby consious. Yeah, maybe that is a better way to describe it. Do I want a baby because I'm ready or do I want one because everyone else is having them and I don't want to miss out? I dream about babies and being pregnant. I have all these mixed emotions. Sometimes I am sad that I don't have one too. Other times when I am around screaming babies I think "Thank God that's not me!" I really think a lot of it has to do with my fear of not being able to get pregnant easily. I need to talk to my doctor about some things and I guess the unknown scares me. I think if I knew it would take me 3 years to get pregnant then I would have started trying a few years ago lol. But if it doesnt take me but 3 months then I'm in no hurry to start. LOL Control issues? Yeah I would say so. NOBODY knows how long it will take them, and I know that is all up to God and in his control, and he has a perfect plan for my life. Why do I even bother trying to butt-in or help him out on the planning? He doesn't need my help. I think he's got it covered. He always does.

Slacker

I am such a slacker lately. I feel like I'm slacking on EVERYTHING and I don't know how to get motivated to not be a slacker. I feel like I'm not giving 100% to anything. I used to think that I had lots of self-discipline but I totally don't. It's not really fun learning that about yourself. I can't make myself work out, work harder, KEEP my house clean (I mean I clean it I just don't put forth the effort to keep it that way), diet, catch up with my friends, get up early, groom my dog, blog, upload my pictures, finish reading a book I started, work on my relationship with God, clean my car out, fold laundry, save money, and the list goes on and on. I mean...how do I make myself be motivated? I am happy, I'm just not happy and productive. I want to be productive.

Change of subject. I want a baby. BAHAHAHA. How ironic that I put this in my blog about being totally LAZY!!! I really do though. I think I'm finally at that place where I am ready. It took me a while to get there, but I'm there. I think it will still be a while until we have one but I definitely have the fever.

My house is starting to look like someone lives there so I really am gonna post some pictures. It has been very empty up until this point and it still needs lots of work but I'm getting there. I love my house. I hope we are there for a really long time. On another note. My dear hubby just has no self control either and even though we just bought a house he wants to buy a truck. REALLY? I obviously think this is a terrible idea and have told him so many many times but I give! I hope our children are not as persistant as he is because I totally cracked. I can't listen to it any more! If we have to live off of ramen noodles and Mountain lightning then that is his fault and he will have to live with his fat wife because you can't lose weight when all you eat is junk. Ha Ha. So while I'm writing this post and eating my lean cusine at work two ladies from another office bring me a piece of marble cake a piece of strawberry cake and a brownie. MMMMM Have I mentioned that I have no self control? Yeah the brownie is gone and I'm working on the strawberry cake. I hate myself. lol I think I am gonna leave it at that for today. Happy Valentines Day!

Draft

I really meant to get back to this but never did so I'm gonna post it as is:

So we are finally moved upstairs. We have been for I guess a week and a half or two weeks. I am so happy. We still need lots of furniture but I guess it doesn't really matter that we have empty rooms for now. Ellie is getting much better with her puppy pad. She is finally using it every time she pees as long as none of the rooms with carpet are open. Poop is another story. Not sure what happened there. We are working on it. I know I have to post some pictures. I don't really have an excuse for why I haven't.

We had our first round of tornado warnings on Monday night in the new house and I have never been SO thankful. I tell you what it is nice to not have to run for cover in the middle of the night or spend the night away from home because it might get stormy. Also on my list of things to be thankful for....A DISHWASHER!!! Oh my gosh. How did I live without one before? My kitchen is so clean!

We are having some friends over for the game this weekend and I can't wait for everyone to see the house. Nobody has really seen it.

Work is soooo slow today. I'm going crazy!

The house

Ok, so obviously I haven't blogged in a while. I have been very busy. My office computer is totally jacked up and it won't let me read the blogs I follow and I haven't had internet for a week at home which now I do so I can get back to my blogging. Anyways we are in the new house :) Sort of. We are living in the basement for now. SOMEONE got the bright idea that scraping popcorn ceilings off would be no big deal. Cough Cough. Obviously the person in question has never done it before and now she is living in a basement instead of the house she just bought. We finally finished the ceilings at around 1am on sunday. It took us a whole week. Yesterday was mostly clean up but we still have a lot of cleaning to do. I finally got the kitchen cleaned up and found a pan and a spatula in the boxes we are living out of and made a Bertolli pasta meal for dinner last night. Our first sort of cooked meal in the house. Since we are staying in the basement we havent turned the heat on yet. We are just using the gas heater downstairs. It was hilarious carrying the huge TV up the stairs and hooking it up in the living room floor and sitting in game day chairs with huge sweatshirts on to watch Dexter last night. We couldn't miss our show even if we did have to freeze our booties off to watch it.
Maynard is too smart for his own good. If he decides he doesn't want to be in the fenced in back yard he just gets out. We aren't sure how he is managing it but he stays at home. We will walk by the door and see him on the porch, or pull up in the driveway and he will greet us at the car. Trouble. Ellie is a ra-tard and is having trouble with the stairs. She has also disregarded her puppy pad so I guess we are starting all over with the house training. Ugh.
Now after we get everything clean we have to paint. THEN we can move in for real :) I am SO happy right now. It has been a lot of work but it is so great to finally have a house.
Oh BTW I realized this weekend that my basement is not underground. BAHAHAHA Oh the irony. That's right people. You may wonder how I missed that before and all I can say is I'm not sure. When you look at the house from straight on you can't see the basement so that wall I guess is technically underground, but the other 3 walls are not. Alot of flippin good that is gonna do me. I actually think it's funny. The girl who is terrified of storms and HAD to buy a house with a basement bought one that isn't even underground. I still feel safe in my basement and I'm sure I will be better off there than in a trailer or a house that doesn't have one at all. I know this blog is jumping around a lot so thanks for staying with me if you've made it this far. I just had to catch up on everything. I have a TON of catching up on my blog reading to do. I don't know why this computer will let me sign in to mine but not view anyone elses. Stupid. Well I can't wait to post more pics. I will do before and afters. I guess that is all for now :)

It's official!! (almost)

So yesterday we found out that our appra isal was good and then it went back to underwriting for an appraisal review. Usually that takes about 3-4 days but we were blessed and ours came back the same day!!! Yay everything is approved and we are ready to close. We were supposed to close at the first of November because we wanted to make sure we were ready financially and because the owners were having to find somewhere to go. At first they were having a hard time because they are renting and they have pets inside. They called us Tuesday and said they have found a place and are ready to close! They said they can probably be out by the 15th! As for the financial situation God has totally provided for us and we are ahead of schedule! I got extra money at work from my unused personal days and Josh sold his 4-wheeler. We have also found someone to buy our trailer and so we don't have to worry about that payment anymore!! It's like the pieces all just came together. I know God had his hand in it. I am SO excited. I have wanted a house for soooo long and it just doesn't seem real. I couldn't be happier!!I guess I could post a pic now that I know it's going to be mine. So here is a sneak peak!

I know the bushes could use some trimming! LOL There is a fenced in back yard behind the poolhouse for Maynard too! I will post more pics later. I will do before and afters as I fix up each room!! I feel so blessed and so happy! It's like all of my dreams have come true! It may sound cheesy but I wanted this sooo bad!

On a totally un-house related note I have been working on my relationship with God. I have been a slacker for quite a while now. I have been praying for the desire to be closer to him because for a while it wasn't on my list of priorities. I am just being honest. I am also trying to take a little time each night to read the bible. I have never read the whole thing before and I think it would do me some good to get some of my facts straight. It is amazing the things that God has put in my path and opened my eyes to. Even the smallest things increase my desire everyday to be closer to him. Jenny if you read this your bible studies and your videos on your blog are wonderful! Sometimes you just don't know what might really touch someone else! So anyways I would just like to ask everyone to say a little prayer for me. I am trying but I know I will have days when I struggle. Everyone does. I want to be a better example for my friends and my husband.

Not in a great mood.

Today I am starting the day off on the wrong foot. I went to bed ill and I woke up that way. MEN!! Ugh! That is all I will say about that.....maybe. Anyways, this whole house thing has my face looking like I just hit puberty! Oh my gosh! Everything is going ok so far, but we still haven't gotten the appraisal. Inspection was fine. They agreed to fix the few little things that we asked them to. Yesterday our file came back from underwriting and it was approved so we are good on the financial end. Now all we need is the stinkin appraisal and I am NOT a patient person. It really has me stressed. I just want to get it over with. I hate not knowing if we are gonna get it. I think once I know we are it won't be so hard to wait for the closing date. We've had 2 people look at our trailer so far and we haven't even advertised it's for sale. They were just friends of friends. Hopefully we won't have too hard of a time getting rid of it. Anyways I am pretty much writing out of boredom. Its gonna be a slow day at work today. Yuck. I'm kinda glad but kinda not. I wish I could sleep. I'm exhausted.
This thursday I'm going to stay with my buddy Cass and I get to spend time with her and her baby Jackson! I haven't seen him since the hospital and he is getting soooo big. I am excited about seeing them both. It will be nice to get away from home and get my mind off of things too. (if that's possible)
Next week is my birthday!!! I am such a kid when it comes to my birthday usually. I get super excited, but this time I'm gonna be 26. Which is closer to 30 than it is to 20. That upsets me. I just want to have my birthday but not get any older. The other day I bought a bottle of wine at Walmart and the lady asked me how old I was and I said "24" before I even thought about it. What the heck was that? Word vomit? I mean I haven't been 24 for almost 2 years now. It's like I'm stuck on that number! Ugh. My birthday is gonna stink too because I don't get a present. Maybe we will find out we are getting the house that day! That would be great! Otherwise we can't spend money on birthdays if we are buying a house next month! Josh didn't get a present for his last month either for the same reason, but I did throw him a party which was fun. Well, now that I'm tired, ill, stressed, and depressed I think I will get off of here. LOL It's better to quit while you're ahead.

Inspection went pretty good. There are two things we are gonna ask them to fix. 1. Weak steps and loose hand rails on the deck and 2. some vent or something in the attic that came unattached. Surely they will fix those? We will see. We are gonna ask them today. Anyways so far so good. Appraisal will be ordered this week so maybe by next week we will know when they are gonna do it. I tried really hard not to get too excited and attached to this house, but the truth is I already am. I will admit that I have already picked out paint colors. Ugh. I hope everything works out. I am just trusting that however it works out, it is for the best!

stress

Today is inspection day! Actually the inspector should have been there for about an hour now. I am supposed to meet him in another hour and a half. Hopefully all is going well. I am surprisingly calm for the inspection. My concern is now focused on the appraisal. We got prequalified for an FHA loan and if the house doesn't appraise for at least the purchase amount the deal is off. I wasn't worried until Josh's aunt told us that sometimes a pool throws a wrench in the appraisal because if it is based off of comparables that have sold in the area that don't have a pool they won't add any value to the house for the pool. Does that make sense? I'm still a little confused by it. Anyways another reason I am concerned is that when the owners bought it 4 years ago it appraised for about 20,000 LESS!!!!! AAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!! Normally a house will only gain equity but the market is so bad right now I am REALLY worried that it won't appraise for enough. The appraisal probably won't be for another 2 weeks. 2 Weeks of stress. We totally made a first timers mistake too! We had just enough for the down payment but we didn't really have closing costs so we gave a little more on the purchase price and got the sellers to pay closing. That was probably TMI for the point I'm about to make. Anyways, 2,000 dollars of our down payment was in a fire proof safe at home. The rest was in our savings account. So we didn't realize that the bank would question where we got the 2000 dollars cash and we went ahead and deposited it in the bank. Then we were told we should have waited and gotten a letter and a check from a family member saying that they "gifted" us the 2000 dollars. That way we don't have to explain how we saved it and why it wasn't in the bank???? Who knew? Josh's aunt says they frown upon "matress money." Hopefully that will be a hurdle that won't be too difficult to overcome but I'm worried that the bank is gonna look at our account and be like ummmm.......I don't think so. It's not like we have an abundance of money. Pretty much JUST enough to make the down payment. Ha ha. We will just have to wait and see. Maybe they won't laugh us out of the bank!

house update

Ok so we put a verbal offer in on the house on Friday. They called us back with a counter on Sunday and said it was their bottom dollar. They weren't willing to budge much on their price. We countered their counter on Sunday night and said we would walk if they didn't take it (it was only 1000 less than their "bottom dollar" and now we have a verbal agreement on price. Josh is meeting my sister today to write up a contract!! I am terrified. This is such a huge commitment and we just keep asking ourselves if we can afford this house. We think we can but you know how life is. One curve ball could put us out of the game and that is SCARY!! I really am super excited though. I will keep you updated!

New House??? Yes Please!

For anyone who is thinking "Here we go again" just hold on a minute. Bear with me here. This is not just another rambling blog about how I want one. So the deal is that me and Josh have found a house that we both LOVE. Josh normally just goes along with me on my house hunting and viewing escapades because he probably just doesn't want to argue. He has not liked a single house we have looked at and we have seen quite a few. This house is for sale by owner and the couple who own it now are super nice. We went to see it for the first time on thursday evening. We both left grinning from ear to ear. We did not even make it to the car before Josh said 'I really like it.' When we sat down in the car he said 'When are we going to the bank?' EEEEEKKKK! Ok calm down Becca. Contain your excitement. The scary thing is that we really had not planned on buying a house. Of course the plan was to build one. About 3 months ago we removed several thousand dollars from our savings to pay off a few things which was definitely a good move, but it made our savings at this point pretty minimal. We weren't even sure we had enough for a down payment, much less closing costs and inspections and the first year's insurance. Then you also have the whole problem of figuring out if you can even afford the payment!! Ugh. So we felt pretty nervous when we went to the bank the next day to prequalify for a loan. We thought they might laugh at us when we told them how much money we had saved. Surprisingly things went really well for us. We had no problem prequalifying. Our estimated payment squeaked in within our comfort zone, and our mortgage guy told us how we could work out a way for the seller to pay closing! Slow this train down just a little bit!!! I can't describe the constant butterflies that have been in my stomach since Thursday!!! Next step.... BEFORE we put in an offer. We are going back on Monday or Tuesday with Josh's dad. I am WAY more nervous about this than ANYTHING! My reality check is going to come in a package I like to call Nicky Wayne Piper. He will without a doubt be as critical as possible. Not in a bad way. Just for our benefit. To make sure we know what we are getting into. I know I need to be as informed as possible, but what is that saying?............................Ignorance is BLISS! :) Ha Ha! Now to tell you a little about the house....It has a basement!! (of course) The basement is finished with a famiy room, bedroom, and bathroom with a huge walk in closet. It has a 1 car garage in the basement for my car and then a small stall that Josh could park his motorcycle and the lawn mower. There is a carport off the back where he can park his truck and then a seperate 2 car garage that he can have just for a shop!! This makes him happy which makes me very happy! The basement and shop were on our must list which is why it has been hard to find something we both like. Now for the kicker......It has an inground pool!!!!!! It also has a nice sized fenced in yard for Maynard! Sounds too good to be true huh? Yeah I know. Don't rain on my parade. LOL I will keep you updated. I almost didn't want to blog about this because I am afraid I will be disappointed, but blogging is to document my life as it happens so if I am disappointed you can all experience it with me!

I want a baby

There. I said it. I'ts true. (Most days) I don't know why I felt the need to write a blog about it other than the fact that writing things down seems to make them more concrete. Maybe it is so on the days when I think thats insane I will see how wishy washy I am? I don't know.

Does Josh want one? I think so. I just think he feels like its bad timing. I agree. We need to build a house first. The crazy thing is that I'm starting not to care. LOL Just wait till tornado season and Iwill care. House first. Babies second. I just needed to say it. I WANT A BABY. Thanks for listening.

Girls trip

This past weekend was our 2nd annual WCO (walker co. outlaws) girls beach trip! I had soooo much fun it is ridiculous. The highlights of our trip:

1. Getting a flat tire on the way and not calling our husbands for help. We did lie and say we plugged the tire ourselves to impress them but eventually the truth had to come out that a very nice man at a gas station did it for us.
2. The absolute WORST sleeper sofa matress EVER. Words can't describe the discomfort. Imagine you are laying on springs with a thin layer of fabric stretched over them and then a huge hump in your back. Oh and no blanket. Apparently a sheet is enough? Needless to say we froze!
3. As if the sleeper sofa didn't injur us enough we were practically begging for pain when we decided to ride the bananna boat. 5 girls being pulled on a huge bannana by 1 guy with a cruel sense of humor = extreme water sports at its finest. I think I swallowed half of the ocean. May I also say that Sarah and I got our tops blasted off by the force of us hitting the water. Cayman our seadoo driver didn't seem to mind. He also didn't tell us. Realizing you top is hanging to your side after you've been pulled back up on a bananna by a total stranger.....Priceless. Thank goodness for the lifejackets we were wearing.
4. Placing the couch cushions on top of the sofa matress thinking that it had to be better than sleeping on the matress alone because it couldn't possibly get any worse right?......Lets not talk about it.
5. Returning to the scene of the crime determined to not fall off of the bananna boat again.....Silly girls. Maybe we should have asked for a different driver. I am not ashamed to say that Cayman our bananna boat driver was much more determined to make us fall off MULTIPLE times and unfortunately he won the challenge. We did however get a discount after we shared our drinks with them and reminded them that they saw our boobies. LOL
6. Eating at Hunts oyster bar where shortly afterward we all decided to call it HURTS due to the CODE BROWN that suddenly struck us while shopping. I am happy to say we did make it back to the condo.
7. Schooner's. LOL I will not mention the details of this night so as not to incriminate any and all parties involved. I will say that I saw a "sweet old couple" dancing and I thought it was adorable until the "sweet old man" suddenly began groping his wife on the dance floor. No worries. She seemed to be enjoying herself.
8. Waking up 3 hours after we drug ourselves into bed, to check out.
9. Almost getting into a fist fight with some folks at the Waffle House before we headed home. We were in no mood to deal with line jumpers. Party of 11? You can't have 4 people show up and reserve a table for 11 at Waffle House. There is no table for 11. It's first come first serve, and by golly we were FIRST!
10. "Mandy" Our cracked out GPS voice who obviously didn't know where she was going. Just say no Mandy.

There IS such thing as having too much fun. I am definitely paying for it this week. Good times, good friends and good memories! I can't wait until next year!!

Wedding

So my sister's wedding was 2 weekends ago in Destin and me and Josh and my friend Kristi and her sister Kim all went together and we had a great time. Me and Josh decided to buy a new camera so we could take some good pictures at the wedding. We got a Nikon cool pix and we were super excited. Josh took lots of pictures. The next day we took the camera down on the beach and it started to rain so Josh decided to take the camera inside. Somewhere along the way he set it down to spray off and guess what??? That's right, it wasn't anywhere to be found that night. We tore the condo apart looking for it and we asked the security guy if anyone had turned it in and no such luck. We were sure someone had found it and taken it. We had to come back home the next morning, but before we left Josh went downstairs to ask them one more time if anyone had turned it in and hallelujah one of the guys that worked the gate at the pool had found it and put it up!! We were so happy! We also saw a beautiful lightning storm over the ocean. Unfortunately it was the night we didn't have the camera. We could have gotten some awesome pictures. Anyways I gotta get off here and get to work!

Just because

I haven't blogged in a while, but I don't even really want to now. I better, or I might quit forever. I have been reading these books my friend Kristi practically forced me to read, but it turns out that I like them. They are the books that the HBO series True Blood is based on. I didn't want to get too into the vampire thing. Twilight was as far as I wanted to get into it, but she convinced me and now I can't put them down. I am on book #9 right now. There are only 10 so far so I'm almost done until the next one comes out next year. Anyways, this weekend was lots of fun. We did our second anual family canoeing trip in Arkansas with our friends. We had a blast. I am still trying to recover from sleeping on the air matress. Not this coming weekend but the next weekend is my sister's wedding at the beach. I am excited about that. I need a better tan. I know I am just being random, but Maynard is getting neutered tomorrow. He has been running off to the neighbors house to visit his girlfriend and we have to put a stop to it. I kinda feel a little bad for him. So the last random thing and then I'm done. I kinda had a momentary lapse in my financial judgement and I visited Buckle with Josh. He was needing some better fitting jeans, and of course Buckle is like the best/most expensive place, but you might as well spend a little extra money on a GOOD pair of jeans that will last you forever right?????? Ugh, anyways he found a pair, but that wasn't really the problem. The problem is that I also found a super cute pair of trouser jeans which I did not look at the price before I fell in love. I will not tell on myself completely, but it was a pair of Seven jeans and I went way overboad. Let me just say that. I had to order them because I needed longer than what they had in the store. Now they are too long, but they do free alterations so I brough my highest high heels and I am going today to have them altered so I can still wear my heels with them. I also got some perfume samples of True Religion while I was there. (that is what I wear anyways) So everytime I think of my shopping extravaganza I start singing The black eyed peas song "My Humps". You know the line where she says "Seven jeans, True Religion, I say no,but they keep givin. So I keep on takin.....etc." LOL I can't help myself. Anyways, that is all of the excitement in my life right at the moment!

50 things you may or may not know about me.

Ok Jenny, I'm stealing your post. That is, if I can think of 50 random things about myself...
1. I love to read a good book.
2. I am terrified of storms. (shocker I know) lol
3. I never had a dog until I was married. I thought I was a cat person until I got Ellie.
4. I wanted to be an elementary school teacher my whole life up until my second year of college.
5. I don't really like other peoples kids. lol I'm sure I will like my own! Good thing I changed careers.
6. One of my greatest fears is Josh dying. I think this spawns from my dad never being around and my mom's boyfriend who was like a dad to me dying when I was 11. I think I have a male abandonment complex.
7. Aside from a few horrible first dates that never led to a second Josh is the only guy I've ever really dated.
8. I was a waitress for 3 years and I absolutely HATED it.
9. I am a sucker for reality television. I love it.
10. I wanted to marry Taylor Hanson when I was in Jr. High. I went to see them in concert 2 years ago. lol
11. I slept with my baby pillow until I was in college. "Pilly" He is in 90% of all photos of me as a child. Even at the fair. I always thought of Pilly as a male. Hmmm...I wonder if this goes back to my abandonment issues lol!
12. I have the most wonderful, selfless mother anyone could ask for. I hope to be 1/2 the mother she is.
13. I wish I was more organized.
14. My clothes would never get folded or hung up if Josh didn't do it. (He does laundry I do dishes)
15. I absolutely LOVE high heels but I can hardly walk in them.
16. I had never eaten at Red Lobster until I dated Josh. He introduced me to a lot of different food.
17. I am scared of heights.
18. Making mud pies was one of my favorite things to do when I was a kid.
19. I LOVE any kind of bedding: sheets, pillows, comforters, you name it. I love it.
20. I wish I knew more about the bible. I guess that would be up to me huh?
21. College was one of the best and hardest times of my life.
22. I HATED highschool.
23. I played volleyball in the 9th grade but I sucked so I didn't try out the next year.
24. I want to see the world before I die. I would love to travel.
25. I used to love scary movies, but now I can hardly watch them.
26. I like my feet. They are the only part of my body I wouldn't change.
27. I HATE anyone elses feet. They are ok, as long as they don't touch me. Josh can't stand that I hate his feet.
28. I like to scrapbook, but i haven't taken the time to do it in a while.
29. I get really grumpy when I am hungry.
30. I love to hear the crickets and look at the stars, my mother used to lay blankets in the yard and we would lay out there for what seemed like forever and just listen.
31. I raised 2 tadpoles from a pond until they were frogs. I fed them shrimp pellets & fish food. Then I set them free.
32. I hate spiders, I got bit by a brown recluse in Jr. High.
33. I have a nose like a bloodhound with a particularly strong scent for alcohol. If you've been drinking, I will know it.
34. Sometimes I type what people are saying in my head. I know it's crazy but I started doing it when I was in typing class and I have done it ever since.
35. My favorite color is purple.
36. I salt almost everything before I taste it.
37. I am the exact opposite of reckless.
38. I am terrible at math, but I had an A in Calculus.
39. I have very little patience.
40. I can be very paranoid.
41. I am HORRIBLE with names. When people introduce themselves I'm not sure that I even listen to their name. Is that terrible?
42. I am also terrible with directions. I could get lost in my own yard probably.
43. I love food, I love it all so much that I can't name a favorite some of the top are: pasta, cheeseburgers, hotdogs, mexican, and pizza. Pretty much junk.
44. I have to drink at least 1/2 a cup of coffee before I go to work. I don't always drink it on the weekends.
45. I am sooo not a morning person.
46. I don't like to floss. Don't tell my patients.
47. I break out in a heat rash on my chest everytime I take a shower.
48. I wish I could dance.
49. I can't carry a tune in a bucket.
50. As much as I complain on my blog, I really do love my life! I am very blessed.

Reunited!! :)

Ok, I am gonna make this post short and sweet. It is basically just an update. I know I change my mind daily when it comes to houses: Buy or build? This house or this house? I just want everyone to know that me and the Northwyke are back together. I know we broke up for a while, but I have dated other house plans, and sometimes you just don't know what you have until it's gone. I thought I would get over it, but I haven't. I spoke with the hubby today, and the three of us are gonna try to make this thing work. I am in love with the Northwyke. Is it perfect? No, but it is perfect for me. I am gonna call the builder and see where we can cut cost.
Has anyone seen that elmers glue commercial where the dad is glueing everything in the house and he is singing: "Reunited and it feels so good!" and the kids walk in an catch him? Umm well that's how I feel about the Northwyke. I have been singing that song in my head all day today! :)

down in the dumps

I am feeling a little crummy today. This weekend is over. Josh will have to work next weekend. I went and looked at a house today. I want to buy it. Josh doesn't. Thursay I stuck myself with a dirty needle while cleaning up a treatment room. Supposedly my patient doesn't have anything, but I went to the doctor friday morning to get checked out just in case. They did some baseline tests and I will have to go back in a month and have a HIV and HEP C test. Sounds like fun huh? Yeah, you like how nonchalant I am about getting an HIV test right? I don't even have the energy to go into detail about it. Hopefully he isn't lying on his medical history, and if he is the chances of me contracting something are very small. Still sux though. This whole weekend just went down the crapper before it even got started. Our grass has not been cut yet so it is getting pretty tall, the only problem is that we don't have a lawn mower that works. We have POS that was given to us that doesn't run, so Josh thinks we need to buy a new riding lawn mower. We just bought a storage building that costed 2600 dollars so by all means lets find something else to spend our savings on that ISNT a HOUSE!!!! I have absolutely NO patience. Instant gratification is the name of my game. We need to get a new estimate with our new house plan, and our lower standards as far as flooring and cabinets, but I don't want our builder to feel like we are wasting his time. I don't know what to do. I feel like I'm running on a treadmill. Getting NOWHERE!!!! Save money, spend money, save money, spend money. Am I gonna die here in this crappy trailer? A little dramatic? Probably. Good news: I have lost 5 lbs. Bad news: I tend to eat more when I'm depressed so I could probally gain it back pretty fast at this rate. I could keep going, but this post is depressing enough.

Good Friday

Today really was a good friday! I didn't accomplish much, but it was a good day none the less. I slept late. Then I drank coffee and watched TV. I finally got a shower, and Josh got up around 2. (night shift) Then I went by the bank to put 100 dollars that my boss gave me as a bonus yesterday in my savings! Yay I love my boss. He really is great. It's nice to know you are appreciated. I told him that he was gonna build me a house he just didn't know it yet. lol. On the way home from the bank we got cherry limeades from sonic. Yum. Oh and I had some cheese sticks and Josh got popcorn chicken. Then we came home and he took a nap and I watched HGTV. After he left for work I went to the tanning bed and went to the gym. Then I came home and took a long bath, and then I decided to go through some pictures so I could take some to work and put in my operatory and on my desk. I had so much fun looking at old pictures. I basically just mentally relived my life from highschool to now, and I have to say that I have had a pretty fantastic life! I have wonderful friends, and I have had some pretty crazy times. I love all of my friends from hygiene school. Wow, reliving that was crazy. Looking back through my hygiene planner was something else. I had my work schedule written in it and it was nuts. I would go to Dr. Katies office and leave there and go to Belk and then I would have an exam at school the next morning! How did I do it? I have such good memories from that time though. I have some hilarious pics of me and my BFFs Cass and Nicole winding down before our graduation and it is pretty fantastic! Cass you know what I'm talking about. lol Anyways, my life and my friends, and my family are all pretty fantastic, and I have so much more to look forward to!